Book of Life

Art
Passion
Pursued bliss
Freedom released
Within the book of life
Envy non-existing
Lust hankered
In anchored
Soul
Me
You
Everyone
Seeking respect
Admiration for self
In the walls of freedom
Loving absolutely
Totally open
Believing
Hoping
In
Us
Seeing
The truth
That lays deep
In the mountain rocks
And every stream
Of minutes tick
This journey
Called life
Exists
Yet
Busy
We are
To feel it
Taste and smell
The beauty of elements
Focusing on opposite
Not the important
The dying and
Not living
Rotting
In
Sad
Despair
Hungry always
Yet full of hatred
Though one day awaking
Realizing and comprehending
Then again reliving
With brand new
Dreams and
Vision in
Bright
Eyes
Yes
Seeing
Life passing by
Why so quickly we die
Then hurrying to grab a hold
Of the book of life
And this time
Reading it
Grasping
Never
Let
Go
For it
Holds on
To the pages
That make you feel
Alive with hot fire and desire
Re-read if you must
Though do trust
Your inner
Voices
Not
Eyes
For you
And I are
For a purpose
Long or short matters
Not the destinations at all
But the journey taken
Lessons learned
Rollercoaster
Is this vast
Brilliant
Life
Us

Grandmother My HERO

Her beautiful face imprinted is forever onto my heart

And no matter where I will journey this will never part

The gentleness in her voice and many humorous sides

She was quirky, silly and fun playing seeks and hides

In her gigantic closets so hard of solid wood

I did my best obeying though rarely was good

Hiding and roaming through her various clothes

Somehow loving the pungent smell of mothballs

Dressing up in her scarves and jumping in feather bed

I loved everything about her from her toes to her head

She is my very dearest now unwell grandmother

Her soul is so very different, not like any other

The love I feel for her is beyond human view

Now only memories held of the times that flew

Her illness in memory lacks and my recognition failed

Though her body still lingers, her soul has long sailed

She was my protector from my father so violent

My escape into childhood I do reminisce silent

Hiding and running from his unsteady blowing fuses

She was my hero rescuing me from these many abuses

Missing her immensely, her voice and warm touch

I know somehow inside she remembers that much

She was a mother to nature, the dying and living

Her soul and life mission always pure and giving

Never wanting and lusting anything for her

Nor desiring or ever wearing any animal fur

Her birthdays come by as I celebrate in silence

Thanking for her help from my fearing violence

She will remain immortal within my heart and mind

Her brilliance and kindness is so hard to find

Alzheimer illness is unkind and fast

And stole a Hero from me at last

I adore you grandmother without end

As angels in my prayers to you I send

And when death hour visits for your pass

I hope you let go this life closing your eyes

There is nothing left for you here

Your great life is long done my dear

So let go with ease

And rest in peace

I LOVE YOU

Finding GOD

Waking with peace that empowers me doesn't last
As the energy of the world hastily creeps in
To every fibre of my mortal soul and skin
And alters this resolute feeling I love
While dreaming of his dove

Seeking to find it again daily, struggling though I do
Before closing my eyes on the darkest nights
Reducing nightmares and immoral frights
While thoughts of God linger amid
As my other eye rests its lid

Finding God is not easy though all of us see his light
Even the blind man whose eyes cannot see
As he is no different then you or me
Can tell you of the one brilliant light
His incandescent love so bright

Collecting rocks along a shore one day I found a rock
So very remarkable one neither so pretty nor shiny
As I shoved this rock in my pocket so tiny
At a magical sunset that refilled my core
And began to look for more

Never thinking twice about what has just happened there
My days of journey just continued along this life
Equally repeated days in bliss and strife
Rhythmic usually are these days ahead
Observing the living as dead

When darkness and despair creeps up to God we all do turn
Even those disbelieving who call him by different name
Jehovah, Allah, Father or Lord it's all the same
We call this name that carries us across
As we all bear this heavy cross

We are such arrogant fools all fighting over the same God
Like vultures and scavengers we continuously peck
And attack with devour, famine and wreck
Looking to find this being we adore
Lessening the chances even more

So again, this rock I found along the shore one day, resurfaced
As I reached in my broke pocket emptiness to show
Then hearing a call in the breeze's gentle blow
Standing along the edge of a rock face
Ready squeezing it with embrace

I looked yet again once more to observe it closely with my eyes
And noticing it was this fantastic fossil I was holding
While my faith and believes were folding
Recognizing life for very long existed
And my birth for a reason was listed

This was the hour I found God and felt his vast absolute power
It was an awaking moment where I had the bravery
To let go of hate, shame, grief and slavery
Of this world I disliked yet coexisted in
Sealed was his love inside me within

As God is everywhere, in the sun, trees, birds, ashes and YES, me
I felt something within inside awake and believe it's him
At this moment when all the lights went dim
Loosing all faith, knowledge and belief
Feeling nothing but soul grief

I once found God on the shore as he unlocked opened another door
For me, just plain old me for why am I so valuable?
There must be a reason for my life applaud able
Just when I was ready to take a leap
He upheld this love ready to seep

You see God resides within all of us this much I now forever know
And appreciate it in the elements, birds, fire and snow
So while living eternally trusting and believing
Somehow persisting and continue living
With faith, integrity and above all giving

I found God

The Messengers

I stumbled on this amazing site of Spirit Guardians about the time I was meant to few years ago and found the fact it existed quite fascinating. It took me of course by surprise as I have been seeing and living with the numbers 444 for the last 10 years or so, though never knew how common this phenomenon was. Are these angelic signs or a secret code from beyond the tangible by the unseen? Absolutely!

 

People notice the streetlights coming on or going out when they pass by or they may hear the doorbell ring, yet there is no one in sight. They open and close doors, walk across your floors in your presence and even though you can hear them, you cannot see anyone. However, they are always there. They will use any electronically controlled device to get our attention as they can and have changed traffic lights in my personal case and saved me from a horrible car crash a few times. I wish more people would just talk to them and create their own personal experience. When the occurrence happens about a dozen of times out of a dozen of times asked, the chances of it being a coincidence is remote not to mention I don't believe in coincidences. Confirmation for me is my own experience and a valid elaboration, while they vary with each individual.

This special number sequence of 444 appears in my dreams, as a wake up call with the numbers on the clock, on the street signs, in the movies I watch, articles I publish, airline tickets, grocery receipts, bar codes on purchased products, during paintings I paint and of course in the work I do and on nearly daily basis. I know these are messages from beyond and here is my story.

My dreams and visions as far as I can remember go back to my childhood of being a one year old. One of my unfortunate predictions was my grandfather's death at my tender the age of 8 years old as well as other significant life events. Nearly 12 years later he passed away from the exact cause as I predicted and his fatal illness was exactly in the area as foreseen. Psychics and many important folks such as my mother told me that this is very impressive, although this is something of a challenge to share with my daily friends. I don't hide my gifts and abilities though I don't flaunt them either. There are many disbelievers out there however I think a lot of those still find all phenomena fascinating.

In my adult life, I have gone to psychics, read various books on visions, dreams, numerology and of course doing some major soul searching as to what this all means. I don't have all the answers although I feel closer to the truth and the meaning of all this has a clearer welcomed impact on my life. There are angels among us and I accept this as I accept my life.

Few years ago one afternoon I felt an urge to seek guidance and grabbed the phone book. I opened the yellow pages and the page revealed a psychic in Woodstock Ontario with the address of 444 "Street" although this place no longer exists it did at the time. Short after I visited a fantastic lady who was very gifted. While her message to me was to read a book called The Messengers I took a lot more with me just by sharing in her presence. She was amused I made an effort to see her and asked me why I was there. She told me I needed not to be there as I know my steady course and am on the path with my abilities. Now this is a psychic who is making a living on the side telling people mostly what they need to hear, and for her not needing me there to make a buck spoke highly of her in my opinion. Needless to say, we chatted for a full hour after which I insisted to pay her for her service and off I went.

 

Of course I found the only and last copy of The Messengers available at Chapters books where I was guided to look for it. The information I gained from this book was not only fascinating but most certainly invaluable and again confirmed what I already had an inkling was happening with me. I don't always take everything I read in a book, word for word. There were few things in the book that did not resonate with me and that's fine. We gain and learn what we need to and simply leave the rest.

Living with the voices and visions that come to me unexpected through the nights, flashes of future events and even moments of unaccounted time loss has led me to firmly believe there is a higher source at work with me, and a great purpose we all have on Earth. We are here to learn something we ourselves have set to, just as we selected our parents and this life we live. Aside from learning something very significant on our Earthly journey, I know for a fact there are messengers guiding us and speaking to us at this very moment. It is up to the people to acknowledge them, hear them and accept them as their guiding force and light and learn what we are mean to.

Now, many call this force God or other named superior being, however the two are often mixed up and misunderstood. Our superior being we call God is a mere reflection of us, as it resides in every living cell and organism in the Universe. Angels are different and special beings, which exist in the higher consciousness and dimensions we all can tap into. They are here to help us live the life we chosen and keep us on the path, while providing us with the knowledge and better understanding of ourselves. The numbers, whatever sequence it may individually be is only a message from them such as acknowledgement a great task has been accomplished, something new was learned or a new adventure beginning or otherwise. There are many reasons for them and are a way of communication and signalling their presence.

 

Through the course of my journey thus far, I've learned that I also am a messenger. Full recollection of the messages given to me and of course my deliverance of them hasn't always been the most compliant thing in my life. I've kept to myself most of my teens as I know my path is unique and during this time I've also tapped into an awareness of my Empath abilities though that's another story. It is up to the individuals who receive my messages to do with it as they wish, should they even accept to receive them. It's either that or I am in need of immediate medical attention and some major drug therapy and I question the latter. LOL

I see things from so many perspectives, angles and dimensions and feel the nature and people on so many levels it is sometimes quite overwhelming. There are days that I think I can hardly handle the stress and emotional roller coaster of my family, and my amazing life and of course my two kids can and do drive me bonkers. That's the real world. However, there is a world that is sacred and unseen by the naked eye, one that lies deep in our sublevel of knowledge and gut feelings. It is our sixth sense, a special portal in the soul through which and where spirit guardians, angels or messengers reside and communicate through. Angels are important beings. It is said we are born with two guardian angels as we take on our human form and these two are by our side until we depart this early vortex. I believe that.

The angelic site has reassured me and confirmed a lot of my personal choices made in life and the people who have come and gone out of it, that I am not insane like I have been thinking for most of my youth. After all the society tells you that when you hear voices you need to see a shrink and need medication. Not in this case. I know the messages I get are clear with visions and a warm and comforting feeling as if someone gave you a great warm blanket over your shoulders. It isn't any different when in time of grief and sorrow, to feel all of the sudden uplifted when seeking comfort in prayer.

A really great friend has once told me that it's all right to talk to yourself out loud even if there is nobody visually present, as long as you don't answer yourself. I think that's also true. Angels love it when we acknowledge them and verbally grant their presence and accept their guidance, however we can and are very capable to communicate through a telepathic wavelength. They are very flexible and we don't always have to think two or even three dimensionally.

 

This firm belief I have a greater purpose has led me to write amazing channelled poetry and paint pieces one can either appreciate or not. I always had the thoughts of what I wanted to say and convey on paper, just never could put it into words just the right way until one special day. A messenger named Edgar visited me and he stayed with me for the course of two weeks. I recall the day perfectly as I sat down and started to write a short story book on my life experiences growing up. The memory is a blurred two weeks of my life in which I have written 7 short story books and amazing faith and confidence has been revealed within me.

I know that I am capable of anything I set my mind into and never question how, why and when. I was guided by a special being that took me into the unknown and guided me in exploring my identity, abilities and spirit. I believe today my life would be different if Edgar hasn't appeared and changed me. I never actually seen his face, nor felt him in the physical world however he's as real to me as my dog is.

We all have guides whether we believe in them or not. Some call them Angels and some just call them friends. Life is a surprise every day and I live it with that in mind. I firmly believe in higher forces among us, which whisper gently to me, lead me out of danger and drive me to be loving and compassionate to mankind and nature.

Are there Angels among us? You know the answer within you so don't let anyone tell you any different then what you believe.

My Healing Journey ♥

Thank you, Genie!

I tell my Genie, "YOU ARE FREE TO GO"! I thank you kindly, however I will no longer need your magic lamp to rub and you no longer have to be a prisoner bound in these shackles and restricted to a small and uncomfortable space.

And the Genie thanks the master, and says, "Your wish is my command".

Allowing myself to feel absolute joy and absorb the pure energy from this wonderful LIFE has been accomplished by simply opening my eyes and mind to astounding possibilities and lifetime opportunities. I do not really need a genie when I am the master of my own creations. Do I?

New opportunities and even challenges have always had their way of manifesting themselves in the course of my life. I just simply would not allow them to flourish and expand into brilliant developments. With my eyes half open and yes also half closed to constant possibilities, they just coexisted along side of me and gave me a poke every once in a while. Hey remember me? I'd eagerly opened my eyes and got a little excited about a project or a venture that sat on the back burner for a while, yet pretty soon it too would fade when I did not see any obvious results with my efforts. So what did happen to me?

I have come to realize an important building block, which would contribute tremendously in my overall learning and personal growth. Throughout the course of my persistence and tremendously solid efforts, I never actually allowed anything enough time out of my "BELIEF RESERVOIR" to even surface to existence, in order for projects and ideas to flourish and blossom. The belief reservoir is that little bit EXTRA we all have within us, after it feels like all our hope and belief within us is used up and sucked up dry. It is the point at which all of us have felt like we've failed ourselves by listening to others, who did not support us nor believe in us that we could simply achieve anything that seemed remotely impossible. I believe that there is nothing in life, which is impossible.

Doesn't anyone break at one point or another when the rest of the world keeps telling you "NO" or "IT WILL BE HARD" and my favourite one of all has to be YOU'LL BE SORRY". The belief comes from within all of us and the universe replenishes it on a continuous basis. We have all at one time reached the point when there were no satisfactory results even though we worked so very devotedly to produce some. For me, just as an idea or a project should have sprouted with that great fertilizer and nutritious food I gave it hypothetically speaking, I just simply gave up and lost any hope. I'd ask myself, "Is the soil bad"? Little did I know that the soil, which I though was non-fertile, was my very own approach? I simply tried way too hard, but the bottom line is I did not dig into my belief reservoir! How could anything ever work out for me if I never truly believed that it would?

I live today as one of the most optimistic and aspiring individual I know. We all have visions, beliefs and hopes. We are also the only ones who can stand in our very own way. I understand that now, and life with everything in it really does make a lot of sense. People actually consciously stand in their own way for a specific reason. They are simply not ready yet to face whatever they are afraid of. It is individual for all of us and yes FEAR hinders our very own beliefs and in result all of our goals and achievements.

Holy life is so very awake and beautifully singing to me now. I am not afraid of anything and I don't think I ever truly was except big hairy spiders perhaps. Still working on that one. I am also not a perfectionist anymore looking for the right avenue or for the perfect opportunity to come along so I could grab it and run with it. I find all opportunities equally perfect and balanced.

The truth is that we are all born bare butted with only the skin on our back. All the doors to astounding possibilities and fantastic endeavours are wide open with parallel opportunities for all of us. Throughout the course of our individual lives it is ultimately our very own choices that keep some doors open and close the others.

Life is beautiful just as it is. We have the ability to see, hear, feel, taste and smell. How wonderful those gifts are. What we are taught at birth is to simply associate senses with individual labels. I have in the past asked myself. Are bad smells really bad, or are we taught they are bad? And what is a good smell? Is that really how a crisp green apple tastes, and is that how the sun really feels on our bodies as it heats us up with its luminous rays and light? Is it "warmth" we feel, because somebody said so? Such as life experiences are introduced and experienced right from birth, such as HOT or COLD and RIGHT from WRONG they are all labelled with the same label for all of us. GOOD ones from BAD ones, and then there is POSITIVE and NEGATIVE ones, gosh who labelled those? Generation after generation after generation after Well, you get the picture.

What if life as it is for everyone was just life? In its purest, simplest and barest form ENERGY? Just as it is! A blank slate and primed ready canvas ready for everyone to paint his or her own life on it! I certainly do, since I am the master of my creation.

As children our imagination can take us many places. Our elders constantly ground us as we float up, get creative and just simply want to soar and live free. "I bet I could fly if I flap my arms and hands fast enough." How many of you have actually thought of that growing up? Who said that it couldn't be done? Just because it may be scientifically impossible, who gave that person the right to spoil the belief of possibility for everyone else? Go ahead and smile if you must, it's all right.

When I close my eyes I can travel to many places and many memories of childhood. I can play a colourful movie in my mind and feel the pure joy of being a kid again. I recall learning the new tastes and smelling the breeze of a fresh bouquet of flowers, and hearing unique sounds, which I now understand that they were all specifically labelled because someone said so. I trusted that you know. Wouldn't you just love to re-learn all of that again with no labels this time? I would.

My earliest recollections of childhood are being strapped into a baby carriage with a soft padded shoulder belt. I was supposedly a "wild one" according to my mom. WOW! I was young, probably just over one year old. My toys have a name and imaginary friends can talk to me. We are all friends and I love everyone. Getting dirty in a mud puddle is fun, and eating sand is simply an experiment. Catching juicy June bugs and slippery snails without the influence of an adult simply being crept out by the act, and my pure and joyful heart so innocent and untainted by society is what I remember the most.

The feeling of living and enjoying life from a child's perspective is a constant reminder that I am choosing to live my life now in the present TO THE ABSOLUTE FULLEST and loving it! Every day I take the time to laugh and play, and see the beauty all around me in everything. I cherish dearly the essence of simply being able to exist in this superior human form and appreciating every day I get to live, learn and play another day.
Who ever wonders what goes on in a young girls mind? My only one wish was to leave my birth country and go far beyond the seas, away from my father so he could not depart his negative energy and his unkind behaviour on any members of my family anymore. Well, I did get my wish. My entire life changed after this. This was the birth of FORGIVENESS for me, way beyond the skies and seas and away from my father. It was the ultimate beginning of my HEALING JOURNEY.

Going on thirteen and turning thirty, as I like to call it, we escaped Slovakia my birth country. Our destination was a neutral country beautiful Austria. Over the course of two weeks hopping across many borders from Hungary, Romania, Yugoslavia and finally on the way to Austria, I can recall many fun and joyful times.

We camped in various campsites and lodges along our escape journey adventure. Two solid weeks of that and we found ourselves smack in the middle of a refugee camp in Austria. When I tell people that story their ears perk up like a Sheppard dog sensing danger in a bush while guarding its herd. They're mouths slightly agape, eyebrows raised and eyes wide opened waiting for the continuation of my story.
Our refugee camp experience was everything it should have been. Nothing less and nothing more since I've accepted what it has taught me. I focus on everything astounding it has provided me with, including an abundant life all the way in Canada. Every day for two weeks, I remember the camp caretakers' generosity and the fact that we all had our own bed and food to eat daily. It did not matter how much food, what quality of food just as it did not matter what shape our bedding was in and whether we showered daily or not.

I have a constant reminder with the saliva gathering just as I write the story now, of dried salty piece of salami shrink-wrapped and preserved to absolute perfection! Utterly delicious! It was my favourite daily treat. The point here is simple. We were kept well and healthy and provided essentials for survival. We were kept comfortable and warm and there was nothing missing, but FREEDOM. Yes, freedom with the bars on the windows and guards standing at each corridor we did feel like prisoners at one point during our stay, which in fact we actually were.

However, everyone can take a look at my story and could ask me a tone of questions. There are many things I could say that some would take on as sad or uncomfortable, yet I choose not to. Our goal and focus was to get out of our home country governed by rules and regulations which we did not believe in anymore and which prevented us to thrive and succeed on many levels. This foreign and neutral country Austria that is magnificent by the way and I plan to visit one day again, has given my family and I the life changing opportunity we requested. An opportunity which I actually manifested, little did I know at the time.

We lived in Austria for six months after we were release from our short two-week stay at the refugee camp. A sour/sweet beautiful experience which I hold dear in my heart. Placing us in a small community home with others like us was actually very tasteful and the individual room housing was small but inviting. We didn't feel alone, since everyone there was in a similar situation. Food, shelter and even the clothes on our backs were provided by the government, which I will forever be grateful.

It was January, twenty-one years ago that I arrived to Canada and kissed my new home ground. Our long and striving goal had finally come to life. Going through teenage puberty years and learning a new language at the same time was no doubt challenging in this foreign country. I survived daily and overcame many obstacles and with that I constantly reached for the stars. Believing in the fact that one day I will make a difference in bettering my life and the life of others was a deep gut feeling that nobody could ever take away from me. IN ANY LANGUAGE!

Here I am. Just like you I have goals and accomplishments that are achieved daily through trials and even errors, learning, living and most of all appreciating. Appreciating life for what it truly is at its core is a fantastic feeling. I feel enormous gratitude towards everyone who helps me and contributes to my constant physical and spiritual growth.

I've learned along my journey that hopes and dreams, which I have for others, are only that! I can point them and steer them in a direction should they ask for help, however it's their own steps they have to take to get there. My own dreams and hopes are the only ones that I have total control over.
Every single being on this planet has the power within to create the life they desire. We are the creators of our own destiny. By allowing ourselves to simply believe in ourselves, and let our thoughts and creations flow through us holding on to the feeling of passion for something wonderful, we are creating the exact feeling in physical form. Whatever it may be.

ANYTHING IMAGINABLE IS ABSOLUTELY ACHIEVABLE!

That is the inspirational adage I live by.

Believing in yourself and taking doubts as "STOP SIGNS" is one way of looking at it. Look both ways to make sure there is no traffic coming and keep going with ideas and burning desires. It's what makes us so very magnificent. Our free will is within all of us and it's what we are all equally born with. Nobody can truly stop us when we set our goals.

In my early twenties I've experienced many different opportunities and overcame many challenging obstacles. I too one day doubted myself whether or not I will achieve everything I was hoping to! Everyone has days that send us for a loop. I like to call them OFF days. They are days that I am not in tuned with the frequency of LIFE and I do recognize that I am not aligned with what is true to me.

Those days or even hours do pass like any other, and picking myself up and shaking off the dust has to come from within me. Nobody literally does that for me. Whether it is inspirational words buried somewhere in a book or an uplifting song on the radio, a stunning sunset or a song sparrow sitting perched on our fence singing his heart away the motivational signs and gifts are all around us. They come from the universe! Again, you must allow yourself to see, smell, hear and most importantly feel.

We have so many senses for a reason and that is to ensure the sole survival of our memories, visions, beliefs, personal growth and accomplishments. Each physical sense can easily trigger an emotion, memory or a passion for something. Taking a look at that literally can help you produce the "fuel" you need to get where you want to be in life, AND GET THERE!
It wasn't until my mid twenties that I met my soul partner. After years of relationships that were mere learning experiences, I literally manifested my future husband. All my projections right down to the details of his appearance are literally evident. I ensured he had a gentle soul and yet looked strong and protecting on the outside so I could feel safe in his embrace. A wonderful man, smart and intelligent, kind hearted with an absolutely beautiful spirit. The funny part is that he could have walked right pass me if I remained working with him with my eyes closed. The universe really does not hear I WANT or I DON'T WANT; it just hears the important stuff in between. It is a quirky vast space with a delightful sense of humour. It accepts the feelings that are sensed and takes them exactly for what they are and literally creates them into object and/or people.

The feelings associated with HOW and WHEN and also WHY are not really important at all. Not the least bit! I guess you can call it a leap of faith if you must, I just know that great things are on their way. I've always known that somehow, I just pay more attention to it now. Some of us are fortunate enough to "UNDERSTAND IT" earlier on in our lives and some of us not so early. However, we all learn at the speed we are meant to and express ourselves by our individual unique gifts and talents along our journey. All seeds need to mature before they too can sprout and therefore create life again. Learning and accepting everything we do is just that simple.

Life is what we choose it to be and that goes for everyone. It has not always been that clear in black and white for me. I grew up with a dad who was very angry and abusive, yet I managed to look beyond his anger as I grew and matured into a young lady. All of a sudden the focus shifted and it was not about me anymore, but HIM. I actually felt sympathy for him. I always remained hopeful that one day I would reach a peaceful place where I could focus on great things in life that would allow me to grow and thrive, and at the same time quiet my mind and heal my soul.

One day in my later twenties and after many years of healing, I decided to send my father a post card with the simple words "I FORGIVE YOU" on it. I thought about that for a while and it made total sense to me. I actually wrote it with a smile and pure joy. It wasn't really that I needed to forgive my father for the things he has done; it was that I had to let go and forgive myself for hanging onto feelings that did not really matter. Most importantly I realized that they were not aligned with my powerful intentions and therefore were a drag in my spiritual development and personal growth.

By letting go of old baggage, little did I know that I actually made room for the NEW refreshing possibilities, stimulating ideas and budding dreams. They literally started pouring in by the bucket loads! It is at this rebirth time at which I was finally able to express myself through my creativity and various arts. I couldn't believe how patiently "IT" sat there waiting, ready to explode into a trillion pieces of magnificent art.

I started painting with acrylics, water paint, using charcoal to sketch, beadwork, creating fabulous sewing projects and even photography. I wanted to do it all, AND I DID! It became clearly evident in all my new arts that I was a changed being, since they were originally very dark and full of misconstrued passion and fury. I started to use bright and vivid colours all interlinked and blended in an enchanting dance. In a paradoxical way as the universe reopened it's doors to me with astounding possibilities, I named my first masterpiece after the quirky and playful vast space, "The Universe".

Just as I was feeling the pure energy flow through me in a harmonious colour spectrum, it extracted and attached itself again to the objects of my creations. Colourful beads became strung on a silver wire, which was curled and twisted to perfection, and semi precious stones twirled along a knotty twine - where a new type of jewellery was formed. Drawings of flowers and animals, and even the sketch of my daughter came to life from the tranquil lead crystals imprinted on the paper, as I illustrated my little heart away with my harmonious vibes. What a glorious feeling!

My creative writing became emergent as I realized that I did have the talent to write. It was encapsulated in a timeless bubble of self-doubt due to my English language barrier. Guess what? The bubble finally popped and a new refreshing outlook on life is what I was presented with.
I can now finally attach the accurate words to the emotions that I am feeling and express my deep passion into little hypnotic paragraphs, which feels wonderful when I write them. I feel a huge relief, love, joy and even happiness and this time it feels like it truly belongs to me. I can express myself freely like a bird soaring in the sky, without doubts and worries purely living and existing, thriving and enjoying.

My two beautiful children came into my life after I performed my deep soul cleansing, and got rid of the unwanted and HEAVY baggage attached to my chakra. I realized and recognized the words "a new beginning" and the true meaning of life and things just got better and sweeter. Opportunities and dreams of becoming a mom became a reality. My husband and I tried for years conceiving but were unsuccessful even though it was plenty of fun trying!

It wasn't until three years after letting go of the past, that I allowed myself to receive the first gift of life. My daughter was born four years ago and what a special little fireball she is. My body may have been physically ready for childbearing for the last decade, however my mind and my spirit were not. "Interesting", I thought and continued my journey, loving and appreciating my gift from the universe. My undeniably gorgeous, talented and amazingly cerebral child - my daughter!

She has already created her own masterpieces at the age three, which she will understand and cherish one day, as I do. I temporarily named one of her masterpieces. It is framed and hangs in our kitchen where I can proudly see it, enjoy it and show it off daily. It carries a temporary name of "Tranquil Vision", until such a time when she will be more aware to name her own pieces.

Nearly two years after her birth, I was blessed with a son. He is very special to me and is in no doubt radiant and amazing as the rest of us. My husband and I were not really expecting anything less, considering both of us are very talented and brilliant in many ways.

I now have the perfect family just as I thought about having, which was literally created by my natural thoughts and feelings from the time I was a little girl - the innocent and pure visions from a child's perspective. My family feels perfectly balanced. The constant joy and inspiration I feel daily from my children and this vast space we reside in, is something indescribable. I am so very obliged to the universe for its gifts. I do truly welcome everything it offers with open arms. No exceptions.

As I look at the 34 years of my life, I realize that they have become a valuable bookmarked chapter, which allowed me to learn and grow emotionally and spiritually on many different levels. I am grateful for my dad and the experiences I was meant to learn. I knew there was a reason that I chose him for a father and it all makes very much sense. I do not question "WHY" anymore. There were deep and powerful lessons to be learned that would ultimately lead me to my definitive purpose in my journey, and also be the best parent I can possibly be for both of my children. It also essentially fuelled and re-fuelled my creative rebirth in terms of becoming successful at doing what I love to do and do it superbly.

Just a few months ago, I became the Chocolate Goddess and that has reopened the most absolute fun and excitement of being a kid again. What kid doesn't love to eat chocolate? The best part of that is, I actually "Get paid to eat chocolate". I feel so tremendously blessed from all angles. I get to watch my kids eat and indulge themselves in the best and healthiest chocolate, ever so ingeniously designed.

Doing many great and fun projects in desktop publishing and even illustrating a series of children's story/memory books has been accomplished by the mere "just do it" attitude. There is absolutely nothing in life that scares and intimidates me. I have so much fun on this planet Earth. I almost always do what feels best to me, and being creative feels like a little flickering fire burning around my aura. I love it!

Staging and decorating homes is a fun project I take on board when I feel the need to add a little spicy flavour variety into my life. If it feels fun and perfect at the time and most importantly inside within me, I just do it. After all, I am pretty good at it. All my fun projects and Art Goddess creations are all a part of who I am.

Every day I have fun with life and appreciate the beauty it presents to me. I take the inspirations I get every day from nature and my children, and produce what I like to call "humble master pieces" for everyone to take pleasure in, should they choose to own one of them. They are my contributions and gifts back to the universe.

As these manifestations of my deepest desires keep flowing into my life at a faster rate then ever before, I realized another great important thing. It's not really a faster rate, it's just perceived as that since I am finally paying attention to it this time. I can actually point out literally dozens of them throughout each day. It has always been that way, and now I know that it always will be. I am becoming a master of manifestations and very humble about it, if I might add.

I have the privilege to learn from my two gorgeous kids many great things yet to come. Passing down my knowledge will be a fun experiment to see my two little turtledoves flourish and reach for the stars with my constant encouragements, praises and rewards. For they too have chose me as a parent for a reason, just as I have chose my parents. I will thrive and be the best I can be, especially in my children's eyes.

It is all about learning and experiencing whatever we are here to do. Forgiveness plays an enormous part in our journey. We are magnificent luminous beings, and we are all here for a reason. Remembering always that we make the decision to be here will make more sense as our life here on Earth is nearly done! What a radiant feeling it is when life does make sense.

My message to you is enjoy your journey this time around and live each day to the fullest as if it was your first one!

Forget-me-not

Bluish are the petals of this bloom
Growing beautifully near my grave
I am unable to touch or smell it
Buried below the soil like a slave

Six feet under dirt yet without pain
Unable to hear the droplets of rain
In silence and blind absolute dark
Lost sanity long ago, it went insane

Forget-me-not and come by to visit
Bringing these small flowers of joy
Invite your daughter for me to see
And do not forget to bring her boy

You may or may not understand this
Reading my few lines oddly composed
Probing how this poem was written
Perhaps you are even a bit repulsed

I write with the eyes of the departed
From another world labelled for dead
Below the surface of our subsistence
In dust and ashes of their wood bed

Nor dead or alive yet somehow living
Co-existence of a soul we cannot see
Hoping we catch a glimpse and wave
To the now deceased of you and me

Mothers, fathers children and soldiers
All who lived, loved and even fought
For better, worse or peace of mankind
Forget-me-not in your silent thought

Anger,

Hidden within resides the beast
Lurking behind rosy tinted glass
A second remains for it to feast
On anything but emerald grass

Devouring the flesh and mind
And each single ounce of sanity
His roaring sounds boom unkind
Pitilessly surfacing in unreality

Shameful of the work he hides
For a while till again one day
The smile of disgrace unwinds
Running wild over without obey

Razor collar around his neck
Does not control the libel acts
Causing scars and pain to wreck
Respect for self it mostly lacks

Punching, shouting heeding pain
Without gentle hand for another
Anger masked without restrain
Deprived of love from his mother

Psychosis surrenders at his feet
Locking him up again for years
Destiny of terror he must meet
As his love cloaks in silent tears

Submitted resolution upon arrest
Cries within the walls of his crate
Striving to be other then best
It settles to feed on his met fate

Decades have passed since I saw
Father's feral beast face to face
His hate and shame in utmost raw
Sadly too resides in my radiant lace

Red Door,

Breathing life is this being
Loudly dynamic and seeing
And even if now not fearing
Fully terrified is the core

Thoughts of peace do coexist
On the vacant never-ending list
While fading amid in the mist
Since walking through the door

Extending and always so giving
Naively jaded yet kindly forgiving
Is the density of this called living
Desiring happiness endlessly more

Faithfully labelled she is a mother
And although never looking for another
Barbed thoughts do sometimes scatter
Hearing calls of dying in the obscurity

While amiss is the irresolute feeling
Inhaling the stench of rot so chilling
Behind closed doors to open unwilling
Forever seeking some sort of security

Modestly sprucing up the doors red paint
Even though the fumes do cause her faint
As the emerging warrior repels its taint
Unloaded are the riches to a local charity

Authority tactfully invaded of the role
As she wins the resigned votes in the poll
Wanting desperately again to feel whole
Still needing, hungry, craving and lusting

This sentiment is not at all welcomed here
Still it lurks silently uncomfortably near
With absolute awareness of the shadow fear
It demands, defiantly wanting the trusting

Walk of life has no bearing on this feeling
Identified simply as the needless fearing
And with facing-off fear to win the starring
Door opens at last with compulsory existing

At last walking proudly through this red door
Believing one day to be worth much more
Nothing like a hiding and shameful whore
Her power of will keeps on boldly persisting

How debts affect your emotional well-being

Bills, bills and more bills, not to mention the calls from the agencies hassling you day and night about forgetting to pay your bill this month. Before you know it you're fighting with your spouse, the kids are crying and you're packing your bags leaving to stay with your mother.

It is not easy to feel the daily stress of being in a debt. It has been proven that high amounts of stress cause our body, mind and spirit to feel unwell while virtually killing us at a faster rate. The health issues are on the rise each year as the current tough economy and rising costs of living seem to be leading us to increasing debt stress.

According to an index tied to the AP-AOL survey, stress is on the rise by 14 percent this year than in 2004.

The people reporting high debt stress in the poll are:
27 percent of people had ulcers or digestive tract problems compared to those at 8 percent with low levels of debt stress.
44 percent had headaches and migraines, compared with the 15 percent with low stress.
23 - 29 percent suffered severe depression and anxiety, compared with 4 percent with low stress levels.
6 percent reported heart attacks, which is double the rate for those with low stress.
And more then half at 51 percent had muscle tensions including lower back pain, compare to the 31 percent with lower stress levels.

Our lives are virtually turned upside down when it comes to the results stress causes. It is not surprising the levels of foreclosures and financial bankruptcy have gone up, but also family issues with counselling and divorce levels on the rise as well. All these issues are due to stress and lack of ability to maintain our bodies calm and stress free.

Medical research studies suggest that most of these symptoms reported in the poll are in fact typical of chronic stress. Our bodies, magnificently as they are built, react releasing adrenaline called Cortisol from the adrenal gland that is often referred to as the stress hormone. It increases the blood pressure and blood sugar while it reduces the body's immune responses.

Adrenaline helps you react fast in a needed emergency, however if the body stays in this high gear for too long, those chemicals can cause physical havoc on numerous systems in the human body. Everything from blood pressure rising to dangerous levels, unstable heart rates and palpitations, memory loss, mood, digestion and even our immune systems are all affected.

Credit cards, car loans, mortgages and student loans cause such havoc on our lives. So how do we reduce stress while being in a debt? Studies suggest that exercising minimum of 3 times per week can reduce stress levels. There are many forms of exercise such as running, hiking, mountain climbing, taking walks, riding your bicycle and even taking a one hour yoga class to teach you some breathing and relaxation techniques, while listening to music also reduces stress.

Every little bit that we can do to help our bodies reduce stress counts for something. The debts are something we have to live with, so why fight it. Learning how to deal with stress and reducing it, is something we have in our power. In the end, not only we will live a happier more enjoyable life in a healthy body, but also increase our longevity.

Debt stress does not have to be a winner in the end. Three months ago my husband lost his job. I had no clue what was going to happen and how long he was going to be unemployed. Between our mortgage, car loan, huge house tax and credit card bills we barely had much left for food.

One thing I knew for sure was that I wasn't going to let this affect our marriage. We talked about our feelings almost daily and some days were easier then others. Having two small children, we explained to them about going places for a while will have to be put on hold. There were few juicy days of fiery fury I have to say and even though it was very tough and we got behind on so many bills, we made it through.

Within 2 weeks of his job loss, we both started exercising and even purchased bicycles with our credit card. We took more evening walks for fresh air and to clear the mind. And while it may have not been that wise to increase our credit card bill, we even went camping for a total of 4 weeks this summer. It took my husband three months to find employment and while giving us the ability to deal with our debt issues together, we have learned a lot about each other and ourselves. Three months later we are not only fit but also much happier and healthier. And, even though we are still in debt our stress is not as bad as it used to be prior to his job loss.

I must write

Despite judgements I sometimes get
My mind is forever clearly set
To write my thoughts with no worry
Peacefully constructed there is no hurry
As I catch a glimpse of fearless furry
To the last drop of my sweat
Rejuvenating is my bet
I surrender albeit

I win over and over with no set place
This never-ending blissful race
Of words strung gently on razor wires
Like gemstones glowing inside the fires
Priceless diamonds, rubies and sapphires
Of the greatest value are my words
As I whisper new rhymes
In daily chords

The cover of novelist been long time blown
I write for entertainment purely own
Though some think I am a fresh conscript
Living in-between this vast imagination rift
With fire I write, passion ever so swift
Pure and meaningful are my lyrics
With no attention paid
To belittling critics

Messages constructed are daily written
As I sit to write entirely smitten
Relaxed by the fire and chestnuts roasting
With another new poem so proudly boasting
And with delicious red wine for toasting
I celebrate my gift with pride
Amongst this talent so vast
With others by my side

Lust

Craving the taste of the divine
Just a sip of red ruby wine to feel it is mine
This welcomed feeling

And while lusting the whole eternity
For a glimpse of reality in this significant identity
Labelled as human

Forever the mistakes we make
And devour the entire cake with care and fashion we bake
We are such stylish pigs

With vast digs into the mysterious
Unsatisfied yet always curious with libel making us so furious
As we continue to trust our lust

Stepping outside ourselves in the final end
No longer needing to pretend yet still counting the grains of sand
With driven need for greed

Then only then we find the truth behind the lust
The lust we solemnly trust like eating the crunchy mouth-watering crust
On a fresh baked loaf

Food for thought as we continue to yearn
With the absolute drive of incomprehensible desire and burn
We are more then human

Hidden Truth

Truth without stinting flows
In gusting bellows while it snows
Of the chilling season that yearly grows

On the vast oceans where knowledge is gained

Silently every year this vessel is sailed
Where overt reality lays unveiled

And sad are these masked lonely sailors
Like camouflaged ballerinas clad for tailors
Concealing their vast abilities and responsibilities

 

Under the bare cosmic stars we hide our obvious scars
Clandestinely dancing in blackness wanting light
Where resonance lays unspoken yet white

Albeit borrowed are these simple ripe words
Intensely sung in delicately constructed chords
Of the angelic choir hiding behind only human attire

When performing acts measured by lucid mind
That forever chooses to be noble and kind
Hidden is the truth only to the blind

We do waste our intellect so deeply bright
As we secretly screen our stains in radiant light
Whilst rumbling darkening skies and pollution of lies

Forcing our incandescent lights to become faded
And perish amongst society so easily jaded
With our bodies so hollowly invaded

Always fighting, defeating and running
Hurting and stabbing with words so cunning
Fearing to surface our truth as this is totally banning

Programmed we lust delusion of needless cash
Burying to hide in decays of world trash
Only garbage and waste we stash

Within this, the toxic noise of pollutions
In manifested outcomes within icy conclusions
Each and every one projecting their very own illusions

Lays but us, we reside in reality shamefully ridden
Where omitted peace and facts are forbidden
And concealed truth is so deeply hidden

Unspoken

Where am I?
Why the darkness?
Who is there?

In my unbroken tear
Silence is near
The undeclared
Of my dying fear

Hush hurry
Do not even breathe
They will hear

My terror frozen to core
Staring at the squeaky door
Hearing the unspoken creak
While my silence is bleak

Eyes wide opened to see
Wishing I could be me
Though nothing

I am aware, always obedient
Yet silence so resident
Observing the unspoken sounds
In the shapes of clouds

Existence anything but boring
Floating above high, soaring
Through birds and stars
Vanishing are my scars

Unspoken is the fear
I cannot see yet feel near
Reaching for my hand
As I solemnly apprehend

Suddenly bright overt flashes
Brilliance in an instance
No longer silent fear
But defiant persistence

The unspoken unveiled
At last clear is the fear I felt
Not at all ever mine
Although conversely human line

Perpetual is the unspoken silence
Uninterrupted and absolute
Where still calmness is in the sphere
And no one ever feels the fear

Where am I now?
Why the light?
Who is in the flight?

My Star

Do not be fooled by the stone you see
Saddened, whimpering and missing me
As it does not mean I am far from sight
It is a stamped ticket to my galactic flight
Few words would do whom I am about
Loving, creating and sure know my pout
My star engraved for our children to reach
As learning from you what I did not teach
Though facet of time is beyond your bend
I see you standing now as I did back then
Even if bodily I cannot be touched and felt
Live with the aces darling that I was dealt
A poker face I no longer have or need
Amity and love with no chance to bleed
Heat blankets me within a glorious light
Only bones lay beneath this stone cold site

Bored

Frozen eminence as staring
Not a fret or single bearing
As I whisper while moored
Boy oh boy am I bored?

Rainbow colour entices me
Though ideas quickly flee
While again I stand in chill
Amid boredom with a quill

Jabbing at it, for it to pierce
The mood that can be fierce
Dusting boredom at my will
Clearing paths for novel frill

Nah fool, never I am bored
Copious things vastly cord
In my life so full of passion
I dress boredom into fashion

Crying

You stand there silent in your poise

Through I hear you softly crying

Not a whisper muttered in your voice

I surely feel you slowly dying

Let out your pain and heed my calls

Do not decay in your despair

Climb if you must or tear down walls

Life still perseveres being fair

Cry if you must and release the beast

Locked up he has been for years

Take a leap of faith and join the feast

Even if eyes are full of tears

Here I am reaching for you once more

Credulous you will take my hand

Wiping your tears from behind the door

And sewing holes for your mend

Letter from GOD

When the wind blows gently on your face
It is my breath you inhale to live
As moments of need emerge for embrace
Both hands to you I always give

Empower your self with faith and trust
Smite the need for hate and greed
Amongst all the bounty restrain your lust
Life is fashioned to flee and bleed

Alongside your journey I guide and stay
Beginning the instance you arrive
Hearing your whispers of your quiet pray
Thanking me for, you are alive

Awake my child and live for right now
As tomorrow is purely a surprise
Your questions of where, why and how
Will unveil at your last sunrise

Your beaming light within will never pale
Even though your strength may seem
And while reminiscing your transience tale
You solely judge of what you deem

Ballerina

She twirled and turned with the most magical glow,
while I anticipated few falls and for her to go slow.

However, to my amazement and even surprise,
dancing melody bedazzled and sparkled in her eyes.

Those pigtails fancied with silky ribbons in pink,
as giving her a smile with a nudge and a wink.

Her qualities were evident in a playful small crowd,
tiny brave two year old who made mother so proud.

Rehearsing weekly for her vast goals to achieve,
ballerina star to be at this young age so naive.

Stitched were the florets in her embellished dress,
silver threads embroidered on each crinoline press.

Twirling, skipping, being the star of the show,
her face was so lit in an untainted beaming glow.

My quiet tears I wiped as I watched her on stage,
as she danced free as a bird that just left its cage.

Then as a trophy was given to keep for all times,
I memorize and savoured her priceless few lines.

I smiled with joy while my heart was on fire,
my little ballerina was a show star to admire.

Although an hour has passed and is gone from sight,
she continues to soar during her journey of flight.

Life Inevitable

Sitting on my porch while counting tiny glow bugs
As they twinkle in an enchanted illuminated dance

Dazzling as they are, I grasp this unavoidable life
While I inhale my days not so purely out of chance

This quirky and vast universe smiles daily upon me
Throwing me surprises to each new party-day of life

Butterflies, June bugs and even moonlight kisses
Fantastic as they are, inevitably in joy and strife

Scale of existence stabilizes and then tips its weights
Just as the perishing crops for farmers hardest work

From the life of a newborn colt in a rising morning
To the mother receiving quintuplets from the stork

Never-ending is the cycle of this extraordinary life
In the rejuvenating droplet of the dews final drop

So precise yet unpredictable and beautifully perfect
Even if rotten were the fruits of the farmers crop

Certainly untamed are the events of the life ahead
As we hunger, lust, achieve and cultivate as host

Manifesting our providence in this cosmic journey
And with absolute vulnerability, we achieve the most

Remember me

As snowflakes fall gently and on your nose they sit
While you walk lost and slowly forgetting my vow
On the darkest nights with only the street lights lit
Kicking stones sombrely with your head in a bow

Once upon a time when you believed life was fair
Beach was our destination as you held my hand
Laughing and running with the summer wind in my hair
And making love under the stars on the moon lit sand

Now, only broken hummingbird glass shards remain
As they flicker and shimmer on the sunlit old porch
You lost yourself and I am here to help you regain
Awake, be alive once more and re-ignite your torch

Remember me with delight, bliss and those happy years
They will stay marked and unable to be washed or worn
In your heart where you have placed me with your tears
We remain united always, it is where our love was born

Wings of an angel

I hear them flutter with a tranquil calm
In the darkest nights of my sleepy realm

Waking to glimpse what is next to my bed
Only blackness of night surrounds my head

Feeling in harmony I do not feel any fears
Overwhelming emotions flows in my tears

Hearing wings of an angel, it watches me weep
Like an owl of the night it tenders my sleep

Upholding my soul this knight of my life
From birth till the end in joy and in strife

Invisible and quiet coexisting while I live
Guidance and protection they always give

In my moments of need and the hours of sorrow
I see their silhouettes through a vision I borrow

Hearing also these whispers from omni directions
I value their guidance and astonishing protections

Thank you to my angels for whose wings I see
For kindness, wellbeing and above all loving me

Choices

I listen

To the utmost prominent voices

Hearing their mere echoes of emptiness

While they whisper and beckon to alter my choices

I trust

This short-lived delegating and swaying

For the radiant core of my spirit is what they seek

As they cunningly reach inside me with an absolute fraying

I believe

My own choice still and repel the sly confusion

And sanction myself primarily with confidence and faith

Since everything else is residual dust of only the greatest illusion

Dragonfly

Like a magician of supreme illusions

Crafting great puzzles and delusions

As off-springs age and begin to mature

Great changes within them they endure

Dweller of the elements earthly affair

Residing in the realms, water and air

Summoning balance beyond even death

Its rising spirit accelerates like stealth

Wings of glass and trim, the tail is long

Dragon extinct in the dragonfly among

Skimming the lakes with an endless glide

Bearer of the will a total empire pride

Breathing no fire this dragon of glory

Composing aerodynamics of the unwary

With poise living along with mankind

Granting wishes to those it will find

Game of life

Whether winning or losing it is all the same

In our existence of prime this galactic game

There are no scores, no major rules to abide

Just stars evolving as on the path they collide

Evolution continues within the journey tracks

Believing in self worth is what the human lacks

Vital significance exists in what is blind to see

Composed of equal elements are you and me

Saddened I possess few tarnished human skills
Wishing to decipher these nightmares and chills
The dogma and stench of constant greed and hate
Is shortening our lives and causing rifts in our fate

Game of life keeps no count on living and dying

Who tells the truth, saves lives or the thief lying

There are no time limits or any deadlines to meet

Only absolution from ourselves in the end we greet

Vast power we have behind our endless choices

Within the echoes of these soft whispering voices

Listening to decide sanctions sole power of one

Till our candle burns out and this game is done

How do rising gas prices affect your daily life?

Has the giant gas on the rise become nearly unaffordable for the average family? What is going on? Some experts say that the prices could jump as high as $12 to $15 per gallon. Yikes! This outrageous leap in price has highlighted the actual oligopoly of gas and other utilities in the world, and it is far from over. While gas skyrocketed in price, the next may very well be the electric cars and hybrids before electricity itself will join the incline and the vicious cycle.

While this incline in gas prices may be a huge nudge towards improving the pollution on our planet with the decrease of the suffocating, deadly and harmful gases, it is causing the average person to be quite outraged. Many commuters are already spending huge portions of their paychecks for gas in their travel expenses and families that live on a penny-pinching budget or pay-check to pay-check may not be able to afford to drive their vehicles for much longer.


Many of my friends are digging up their old bicycles out of their garages and even purchasing new ones, while riding instead of driving to their destinations such as work, quick grocery stops and small errands. Just recently, one of my friends has actually gone as far as selling her car and bought an electric scooter as a result of the gas increase and possible predictions of the incline. The truth here is that we have become too dependent on our vehicles to take us to our destinations. By riding our bikes and even walking to near by places, may be the beginning on improvements on our overall health even though the adjustment may not be the smoothest. Let's face it. This gas explosion may not be such a bad thing after all when we look at the overall picture.


While all of this could be a future blessing in disguise, I myself am feeling the effects of this soaring gas issue. Lately, I have consciously combined my daily errands into one weekly one and it's amazing how much money and gas I have actually saved. Walking my daughter to school has become a must now, where before I would sneak to drive her on lazy or rainy mornings. When raining, it gives us a chance to snuggle under an over-sized umbrella during our walk and spices up our mornings, while bringing us closer.
Other ways we have found a way to decrease the use of our vehicle has been less frequent grocery stops. We buy more non-perishables such as bags of powder milk, canned food, more rice and potatoes, and overall stocking up our shelves and freezer to avoid the grocery trip.

Being a mom of two toddlers my job is to ensure there is plenty of food on the table. This extra expense going towards the gas has affected us other ways too. It has taken a significant chunk out of our food expenditures for the month. I have resulted to clipping coupons and saving every possible penny that I can to offset our budget. It is actually amazing how much cash I have been saving due to clipping coupons.

From an entertainment point of view, we do our best to stay in town for movie theaters, where before we would drive the 20 minutes out of town to a big screen. I value the time I spend with my family and on the weekends we usually hop into our vehicle and drive somewhere, anywhere.

My children absolutely love going places. Our mini road trips in the summer months are almost every single weekend. We explore nature, the great lakes or the beach and the cost of the weekend is very minimal. Packing snacks and lunches means we only spend the necessary gas money and always make our way home to avoid lodging fees. This summer however, we are looking at purchasing bicycles for our entire family of four and riding to the near by trails for our outdoor exploration and picnics.

We also pay attention to the fluctuation of gas. Even a few pennies dropping overnight will nudge us to fill up our gas tank, even if it's only half full. We find ourselves driving our cars only in the essential and necessary occasions these days. While I am nervous about the entire gas issue, as a family we are also considering other more drastic measures about the type of vehicle we are driving. We have discussed selling or trading our cars we currently have for a hybrids or electrics vehicles, and if we were to sell them this would be the ideal time. Who knows what will happen 3 to 6 months from now?

This awakening of the entire damaging pollution and recent gas issue could very well create a sudden demand and therefore surge and shortage of hybrids, and the prices of the those vehicles could just absolutely skyrocket and become unaffordable to us.

While I am not very optimistic that this gas issue will be resolved and equalized any time soon, in the process I have learned and discovered many money saving techniques, which are absolutely invaluable regardless how high or low the prices are.